Done lists

The trouble with what flutters by is that my thoughts get no further than my head! Apologies!

But before I get onto the subject of this post let me tell you the happy news. Our new grandchild has arrived! Babies surely have their own agendas because he took us by surprise and was born at home. Lovely for us all, and especially for the firstborn.

Like most of us, I suppose, I have my 'to do' list, and often items get transferred again and again which can be discouraging. Makes me feel I never quite catch up with myself... probably true! Ticking off or crossing out what I've actually managed to get done doesn't give me much of a sense of achievement or satisfaction, so I've decided to run another list alongside. This will be my 'done' list. I'll write what I've done on this, even if the item is as mundane as having done the laundry, for instance. It's too easy to overlook the little things that actually contribute to our living every day and my energy is better when I can acknowledge that I haven't exactly lain around in sloth all day!

Waiting

When your parents are heading for a hundred, you know that one day they'll be passing over. You kind of hold your breath, waiting and wondering, living with the knowledge that death will come one day. That chapter in my life is closed, although I live with the warm love of my mother around me, and many thoughts and memories of her. One of the great blessings of having your parents with you until later in life is that you can learn much about yourself through them. For instance, you can see what habits you've picked up, what soul attitudes and ways of behaving and reacting. Sometimes these are good, sometimes more challenging. Then you know a bit what you need to work on!

But right now I'm holding my breath for an event right at the other end of the scale, although equally mysterious. Any moment I expect to hear that my daughter-in-law has gone into labour. Yes, the little person will, God willing, soon have a sibling.

It's a strange feeling, this waiting. Barring drastic human intervention, birth and death remain in the lap of the gods. Well, the full moon's coming up, and babies often like that time to be born, so maybe we'll be welcoming another Gemini into our family.

The unsent Mother's Day card

Over Easter on the Outer Banks, I bought a mother's day card. It simply shows a strip of beach sand, the edge of a lacy wave and a star fish. The message is: I love you, Mom.

My mother died almost a month ago, exactly a month before her 98th birthday. So I flew south to the beauty of mountains, lakes and ocean sides seen in the still clarity of autumn light, to give her the best send off I could. I believe she eased the way because we managed to have a fine a family gathering and the great blessing of a Christian Community funeral, one that is directed towards easing the passage of the departing soul from this world to the next.

Leaving her earthly body wasn't an easy process for her and dragged on over some months. She'd seen a woman dressed all in white at the door, she'd had visitations from my departed father, from her own parents too, but then at last she was able to be free. Over the last days she would sometimes call out "Mommy!" and I thought about small children, how their first word is usually 'Mama'. This surely, shows the measure of a mother's importance in our lives. For all who are or were lucky enough to have a mother as wonderful as mine, the words of that unsent card will surely always echo in our hearts.

I love you, Mom.